Sunday, February 2, 2014

~~For Love of Minecraftia: Chapter Five--Clickity-Click Clackity-Clack~~

Not at all surprisingly, I woke up right back in Minecraft. I was starting to get used to this. Besides, it was actually pretty damn fun to be here. Not only was it Minecraft FOR REAL, but it was also always filled with really weird people. I hadn’t enjoyed Pedobear at all, but Legolas…he’d been pretty cool. He wasn’t the worst person to run into, especially because he was so fudging hot! I just wanted to cuddle him—but then he’d tapped me on the butt and it just got bad.

I rolled over in the bed, hating how hard it was. God, no wonder I was so sore…. This bed might as well have been made out of cobblestone and the blanket itched something crazy. I really could do without this damned blanket….Groaning, I clambered out of bed, curious about what I’d eventually find. I rubbed my stomach with my hand, only realizing something a few minutes later: Both of my arms worked. Well. That’s a really useful thing to have happen, isn’t it?

Feeling more and more pleased with my lovely world, I wandered out of my room. It was time to get some food. I definitely needed more food. My stomach was practically yelling audibly at me about its intense desire for food. I needed the food, and I needed the food now.

In response to my intense need for food, I climbed out of the bed and just ran as fast as I could down the stairs. I whirled around the corner, running at full tilt down the stairs to the kitchen. Naturally, I ran smack-dab into the group of blocks with a door in front of it that formed my “fridge,” but at the moment I really did not mind too much. For now, I was just too focused on getting food that it felt like the rest of the world could end and I wouldn’t care as long as I got to have a last meal.

Eagerly, I ran for my chest, opening it and reaching in. I grabbed the delicious bread, and some pork as well—there was no way I wanted to try picking apart the fish again. I loved fish, was far, far too gross to be worth it.

Carrying my prizes, I scampered towards the dining room, unable to stop myself to starting to take several large bites of it already as I walked. It was not worth waiting for. God, that bread….So unbelievably soft!

The large loaf was half gone long before I reached the dining room “couch.” The scarfing continued long after I had successfully plopped myself down on the couch, and when the bread was gone I moved onto the pork. It actually wasn’t that bad. Tasty enough, I suppose. I regretted not breaking into my special stores of mushrooms and making up some stew to add to this meal. But, hey, if I was still hungry in a few hours maybe that would be a good idea?

I finally finished the pork, getting off the couch and starting to head out of the room. I figured I might as do some mining while I was here—get some work done in the basement while I was here. I had a couple plans in mind for the basement—plans I hoped I remembered.

Whistling a cheery tune, I headed down to the storage room to fetch some supplies. About a third of the way down the hidden stairs, I remembered I’d need to get my pickaxe from the chest by the front door, and maybe my axe from my wood chest as well. Shrugging, I decided it wasn’t worth going upstairs right now, so I kept heading down the stairs.

Four steps later, I found myself in the crude rectangular room that functioned as storage. Wondering if it would ever be worth editing the layout and making it prettier, I headed to the chest that held things that I considered ‘pretty’: Stone, cobblestone, and several blocks of wool. I took them all out, and started walking back up the stairs.

I was about to head through the painting-covered doorway that hid this room from the rest of the house when I heard it. It was the strangest sound, a pair of weird clicks, than a sound that could be nothing but the sound of something being dragged.

I stopped dead. Oh god….Could it be? No….No, it couldn’t be! She was only a myth, a horror story told around campfires. She couldn’t be real; there was no way that she could be real….

Deciding it was best that I went down to my storage room and tried to find my armour and maybe a spare sword or two, I swallowed, and snuck down the steps. My heart was beating in my ears, and I almost swore it was loud enough to echo in the nearly empty room. Trembling in the torch light, I slowly opened the chest, and donned my leather armour as fast as I could, before pulling out my most prized possession: My iron sword. It was the only iron tool I actually owned—the best thing that I could use against…whatever the thing was that clicked, clacked, and slid across the dining room and library of my wonderful house. Trembling, I sat down hard on the chest, needing to breathe. I would have stayed there forever had I not heard the distinct sound of a block being broken by a pickaxe, and I couldn’t help but flinch at the noise. Who knows what had just been broken and stolen from me? Swallowing and refusing to admit how scared I was, I got up and started to walk right back up the stairs, being as quiet as I could I wanted to sneak up on whatever was out there, and maybe having the benefit of surprise would keep me alive…..

Just as I’m walking through the painting and becoming visible, I figure now would be a perfect time to tell you as much about Click Clack Slide as I can—the creature I might just be facing….

Click Clack Slide used to be a little girl. Her mother sent her out to get milk at the corner store. She didn’t want to, but her mother yelled at her so she had no choice. So she took the money, went to the store, and came back with the milk. On the way, her sneakers hit the train tracks, and she tripped. She was about to get up when she realized her feet had gotten all tangled up in the train tracks. She couldn’t get up, no matter how hard she tried. Getting scared, she heard a train coming, and she started to cry and scream for her mother. Shaking with fear, she could only watch as the train came for her, and severed her legs. The little girl was never seen again….At least by no one living.

One of the most known sightings of Click Clack Slide happened not much later. A little girl was sent out to get milk just like she was, except when she got there they only had two bottles of milk. Unfortunately, her mother had asked for three bottles of milk. Knowing she’d get punished, the poor girl went back home—crossing over the same train track that Click Clack Slide had been killed on. She went over without issue, thinking to herself about how weird it was that her brother’s skateboard, her dad’s duct tape, and her family’s knife and fork had been missing for the past few days. When she got home, her mother of course yelled at her, ordering her to stay outside in the tent that night. The next morning, when her mom came out to apologize after she’d sobered up, she found the bloodied remains of her daughter’s body. Weirdest of all was the skateboard tracks and oddly shaped holes that led in and out of the tent….

Well that was a creepy little interlude! Let’s get back to the story….

Swallowing, I left the hidden room of safety, entering my living room. Feeling scared, I trembled a lot weakly, not at all sure what was going on in my world. How did she get here? How did any of them get here?

Swearing, I absolutely knew I couldn’t get any more cowardly than I was at that moment. Unfortunately, I also knew that caution would be the absolute best course of action. I had no idea what could be right around the corner of my room. I just did not know…..Almost whimpering with fear, I stood up tall and raised my sword, running into the room, my sword raised high.

Sure enough, I found her—a bloodied black blob, crawling cross my floor. I swore and trembled, running up behind her. Heart in throat, I brought my sword down on the beast’s head, only….

Only to have the THING roll forward on the skateboard, flying down the stairs and running into the door. The sword dug itself into the block of wood, and I frantically started punching it, needing to get my sword free. Finally it broke, and I raised my sword just in time to come face to face with the horror that was Click Clack Slide. Trying with all my might not to scream, I stabbed at the black-haired abyss that clambered up the steps in front of me, only to have the silver tines on the end of her fork catch on either side of the sword. I tried to wrench it away, but she was stronger than me, sending the sword flying across the room.

That was enough for me.

With every bit of the strength and speed in my body, I turned around and freaking NOPE’d my way out of the house, running like there was no tomorrow. Hell, I knew there would be no tomorrow if she ever caught up with me….

I nearly broke down the door in my haste, barely managing to get the doorknob turned and open in time for me to burst through it. Screaming like a tortured baby bunny, I almost flew down the steps, before running into the lake, swimming across it as fast as I could. She couldn’t swim, right? There was no way that skateboard would float!

Whimpering, I swam around the lake, biting my lip tightly. I didn’t want to get hurt at all. One interaction with Click Clack Slide, and I would definitely be hurt….Or, make that worse than hurt. Shivering, I turn around in the lake, unable to see anything. I couldn’t spot her anywhere on the shore, so I relaxed and breathed there, floating in the lake.

I closed my eyes, starting to float up. I almost reached the top of the water, when something grabbed my ankle…..

I was dragged down deep below the water, kicking and screaming. I barely had to bother and look down to see what was there beneath me—of course she was there, waiting to kill me. I started crying, starting to say my prayers, wishing to god I could say goodbye….

If only I hadn’t gotten addicted to Minecraft!

Suddenly, a different hand reached down and grabbed me, one with many rings. I was pulled slowly up, almost being torn in half by the two forces pulling in opposite directions. My vision was slowly fading, but I think I know what I saw, and what I heard: “Breathe….Breathe for Captain Jack Sparrow,” the man with dreadlocks, dirty clothes, and a three-cornered hat said.

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