Sunday, March 17, 2013

~~In Deference to my Disease~~

Ah loneliness! Such an easy thing
To claim when I get
Into trouble I can't escape
All the needless prattling

On and on about right and wrong
Listening endlessly
To the same song
Living through the night, longing for dawn

All the endless procession
Of the same old excuse
God only knows when I'll realize
That it is no use!

I can't excuse my behaviour
For I've been deemed insane

I can't excuse my lies
For it's all a silly silly game

It's all a silly game
That's all it will be
And it's all I desire
If I play it well, I might escape from my shame

I hate this vivid feeling
That comes when I cry
Such a superior broken agony
It makes me realize I never did die

My life, it never ended
Myself, I never hated it
All I seek is attention
And god knows I'll go far to get it

My disease, if it can be called that
Is a disease I put on myself
A form of self-defence through self-destruction
Burying my heart on its shelf

The childhood I no longer possess
Has now faded from my memory
Even my recent torments
Are passing away from me

How long will it take
For me to forget
All the decisions
I've come to regret?

In deference to my disease
I bow as it passes on by
A tip of my hat
To every forgotten lie

I should move on now
It no longer matters
It is over with, said and done
I will no longer shatter

Farewell, former memories
Farewell pain I held so close
You're out of my mind now
To a place where the internet knows

Found in old blog entries
Journal entries
And Facebook statuses
My blog surely hosts

A great many memories
Good things, and bad
Farewell, nightmares
There's fun to be had.

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I love you, random stranger. Thanks for dropping by, and for dropping a line. --Half Mad Writer